Betrayal at House on the Hill: Ashly Burch, Keahu Kahuanui, Michael Swaim join Wil on TableTop pt2
Previously, on tabletop, okay, so now i’m a priest wielding a spear with a pentagram medallion in armor. Oh, my god, i got a revolver, oh god, oh, my god, a blood dagger! Oh the blood, dagger dark dice, dark dice! Oh, i hope we’re on the same side. Rabbit’S foot once during my turn, i can reroll one die.
What wow? Oh my god, you guys have all the good cards. If kyahu or michael are the trader. I think we’re in we’re in time. Everyone’S room is shaking.
The traitor is the player with the highest knowledge, except for the haunt revealer right. My knowledge is five. I’M the traitor, all right! F, you guys. Okay, so yeah, we’ll read along you, go ahead all right, so we’ve got haunt 28 ring of king solomon.
As you idly studied, the ring your eyes suddenly catch inscriptions, you’d missed earlier. Did they just appear? The strange marks look almost like pictograms, but even as you stare at them, they rearrange themselves into a language. You can read one ruling to rule them all. King solomon’s ring the letters morph once more demons bow to you and then one last shift.
The hell gate is open. The house quakes a hot sickly, sweet wind, blows, hot sickly, sweet wind, close to the house, a scream, promising an eon of pain. I’Ll give you a need, it sounds from another room. You’Ve never heard anything so terrible. Nor can you imagine what sort of creature could give voice to something so purely malicious, except perhaps a demon from hell.
Perhaps i’m pretty sure, can we up it to sure? I’M pretty sure it’s demon for mel all right, so will’s the traitor and he’s gon na have uh a demon lord, that we have to kill twice: yeah, okay, so yeah. What we know about the demons is that they’re entering the house through a portal from hell. They want to kill everyone. What else would they do find better things to do with your time demons than just yeah, you know, but they bow to us.
They bow to us yeah. We have the ring. So should we all go to you or you? Okay, keep this in mind. I’M gon na read the special attack rules, because this is how we actually kill the demons, the priests, of course, because that’s what you learn in seminary.
The haunt’s amazing, because i’ve only played this game once before. And now that the hans kicked in we’re going to play a totally different game than i played last time when i played, i became a werewolf and this time i’m killing demons. So that’s just a really cool part of the game is the game at least like 50. Some odd times is going to be different. If you make a sanity attack against the demon, lord using the ring add two to the result of your role, defeating it once stuns.
It defeating it. A second time, destroys it okay and that’s how we win. So we win by me killing the demon twice and being the hero, and you carry me on your shoulders out around that: okay, okay! So the plan is, i’m gon na go in there and we’re going to get rid of that lights out card and then you’re going to give me the blood dagger so that i have a weapon okay. So i’m going to run straight upstairs, you guys are going to figure out the flashlight situation and we’re all just going to stand back to back and you’re just going to lay waste and i’m just going to spray and you’re just going to shoot and you’re.
Just going to blow daggers and it’s going to be fine, it’s going to be great. So when i saw that i was going to be the traitor, my first thought was well, i’m dead in two turns because i’m worthless and weak until i found out that i’m commanding an army of demons, i’m still around for a little bit longer. I feel i feel pretty confident we’re gon na defeat. Will, i think, it’ll be. It might be balanced because it sounds like he has multiple demons.
So hopefully we don’t destroy and embarrass him immediately. Hopefully, it’s a good fight, but i’m pretty sure we’re gon na win. I’Ve got two weapons: we’ve got a heavily armored paladin father. I am a priest with armor, a full set of armor, a lucky rabbit’s foot, a pentagram chain and a spear and a magic ring that drives you insane. Okay, i’m fine!
Oh hey guys going on. I just went for a walk, not thinking about murder, killing, okay, good, that’s all good sure you can rely because we weren’t either. We were certainly not thinking about circling a child and just kicking him yeah, yeah. Okay, all right! Well, that’s good!
I’M glad to know that hey um speaking of those things it turns out there’s a portal to hell in this house. Oh, oh, he is there yep and it’s it’s kind of why peter brought you here. He really wanted to show it to you because it’s awesome. It’S really great portland hill actually is going to open up in the game room right down here, which is appropriate because it’s where all of the dungeons and dragons guys are there’s a portal to hell in the game room, presumably because a little boy played a quick Game of dnd and summoned a bunch of demons out because, apparently that’s what happens when you play d d, there’s a demon lord and a bunch of demons, but whatever they’re fine they’re, just they they give great hugs they’re cool right yeah. They give great super super duper.
Amazing hugs go ahead and uh, and you can start so we’re right here. You’Re welcome come on down this way benedict arnold america’s greatest friend. That’S right! That’S very true. Cheers cheers cheers all right all right.
So let’s kill this bastard. What what we’ve got this kid? We’Re hanging him on my wall? No, you guys! That’S not what we talked about.
Oh no we’re still here we were talking about something different, we’re gon na we’re gon na just stop here: real quick, get rid of that lights out card for him, oh okay and uh. I want to just chuck this well i’ll. Take it! Actually, you know. Do you want to take it?
Yeah, like i collect, knives, actually yeah cool little known fact, it’s a little it’s kind of heavy and it sticks into your arm yeah. I’M really surprised that they gave the blood dagger to ashley, because her character’s, not especially fast every time you use the blood dagger. You have to sacrifice one speed so um that might end up helping me. So that’s the end of your turn and now uh your turn. It’S gon na happen thanks to the survivor’s guide.
I know that the only thing that can take the demons out for good is the ring. Luckily i have the ring, which is sanity based and i’m the most sane. So i think we’re actually really well positioned to kill these demons so me and scruffy we’re gon na go one. Two now does the secret stairs? Does that take one uh yep?
Okay? Three! I can’t go straight to the game room. I’M sorry, keep the fiddle. Faddle warm for me, stop away you guys.
I mean that’s. I don’t know we can’t stop in the attic just a quick thing together: yeah yeah, all right – and that’s me – is that i clang with all of my stuff and that’s yeah uh. What are you gon na do now um flash? Let me just put this out there make this very clear to all you: people, the flash, is faster than superman. Anybody who says otherwise is stupid and probably a witch.
I think i’m going to roll the dark dice. Okay! Well, you heard you’re going to say that yeah all right roll them dark dice. Oh god that was the worst thing i could have done. What happens when you roll zero with dark dice?
I wonder no. I can’t. I can’t see that far and my eyes are bad from reading books in the library what happens when the dark, dice scroll, zero, reduce all of your traits to the lowest value above the school symbol discard the dark knight, wow, okay, zeros, all zeroes. What are the statistics of that? I have no idea how that happened.
This makes things significantly easier for me. I i think that i actually have a chance at winning. Now i have to hit yahoo once i told him you do not roll the dark dice. You roll the dark dice in a dire situation. He’S just like.
Let’S see it’s almost like the dice thought, i was rolling them. Okay, so before the demons come to visit, um peter is gon na do some stuff. Peter is gon na go one two three four! Please move peter to the graveyard gladly and peter’s gon na see if he can find that um wall switch. That’S the basement, oh yeah.
He finds the hell out of that wall switch. Would you please move peter to the coal shoot you to the basement? Okay, great and um. Now the demons are going to come visit you guys because they still want to hug you. So these demons apparently are hug demons they’re, just they just really.
They just really need some love of which i will give them. None so demon number one has a movement of two okay. He goes that way. The demons have rules governing movement. The demons must move their maximum movement toward the nearest uh human target demon number two: oh look at that two.
Four: six, eight guys guys one two, three four, oh no anywhere six, he was he is so looking forward to seeing you. He is so so so looking forward to seeing you. However, he has to go to the person who is closest to him, which means that he has to go to dr meat shield. Father reinhardt is the biggest threat to peter and to the demons he’s got the ring, which i don’t know why the demons want it. I just know that they want it, so i assume it’s powerful for them, but he’s also a threat to peter because peter’s, squishy and weak he is going to attack you.
So what is your might? My might is for right spear, but that’s only on an attack. I got enough and i just got the four might that’s it. So the demon is like you know what uh-huh i really want that ring ooh. So if you could just give it to me, that would be great.
You have. I surreptitiously take this opportunity to rub on that little lucky, rabbit’s foot there yeah allows me to reroll one, and i think you have to beat me by two to steal. Okay, this is one of my favorite things games like this. That beautiful moment when someone’s, like. Oh i’ll just take that and you go uh-uh-uh lucky rabbit’s foot in case you’ve forgotten re-roll.
A dice always good saves you at the last second. So let’s see, let’s see, why have you abandoned me? Oh lord! Ah, that’s a bummer! That’S a turn!
That’S a dark turn for us. I don’t think that’s gon na end very well to tell you the truth. We needed that ring. You guys. I know we did you know after will was revealed as the traitor.
I felt pretty good um, but since all of our roles are the worst thing that i’ve ever seen in a board game, i’m pretty sure we’re cursed. I don’t know if we’re gon na win this anymore, so demon number three is like you guys. Don’T what about me rolls this guy four six he’s going to move eight one, two, three, four: five: six hi, hey how’s it going! What’S good! You know anymore.
It’S going so good 30 seconds is going to attack. You might again yep! I imagine okay. Oh that’s! A pretty good roll okay come on, i rolled a four, so nothing happens.
Okay and then the demon lord, has a speed of two. The name of my demon, lord, is steve. Steve. The demon lord uh comes from the darkest pits of uh pleasant hell. The demon.
Lord is like you guys, first of all, i’m the boss of you, okay, second of all, hugs and he’s gon na move there, and my turn is done. I don’t know what the demon lord’s name is, but if i had to guess it would be ass fart. I am going to grab my spear and jab at the from the hearts of hell. Okay, they try to steal that which one are you jabbing at whoever’s got the ring. If i can do that, the ring is what we need.
The ring is – and i don’t care what it takes. I know that i’m not the strongest guy, but i got my armor. I got my spear, i’m going for it. It’S a snatch and grab. We got ta, have it okay, so i’ll just go ahead and roll mine.
Now and then you can do yours, okay! Oh he rolled zero, one, two, three, four, five, all right! So minus five! We lose to a small child hanging out with the mattress one. Two three: four: five: six, seven, seven!
Okay. Can i steal the ring back? Did you beat him by more than two seven to five? I did uh yeah. Then you can still explain father reinhardt in the house.
Okay, this is back on track. I have the ring and i think i’m gon na pull it out. I think i still got this so peter right now is in the basement, i’m guessing that there’s something down there that he might need like. That might be his win condition. Primarily.
I want peter in the basement because he can get omens and objects and things that are useful for him. Just in case the demons need help killing the humans. He loves bedrooms, this we know. So why is he down there? I feel like there’s got to be something he needs down there.
Maybe i can make the humans think that peter needs something in the basement. We’Re not really sure if we need to stab the kid and then go after the demon, lord or try and do both. If i can do that, i can split the party, i’m thinking that we either need to split up and have some people take care of the demons and some people take care of peter or something’s going on he’s. Definitely in there for a reason, never split the party, okay, so well, the knowledge would be or sanity is gon na kill the demon. Lord.
If you end up with the ring, well, maybe i might, it would be a i don’t know we’ll see. My book doesn’t tell me that the ring can hurt me. All it tells me is that the demons want it they’re talking at the table about how the ring can kill the demons. So now the ring becomes a thing that i absolutely must have. Instead of a thing that i just want, what would you like to do?
Flash you wan na come and visit yeah, and i’m gon na attack demon number three go ahead, so the first demon’s name is nigel. The second demon is also called steve. The third demon is bruce and the fourth demon’s name is unpronounceable by humans, so we just uh also call him steve uh. You can use a revolver to attack with speed instead of mite, which is what i’m going to do, because mite is only two, but i also roll one additional die on. My speed attack.
Roll okay! Oh, that’s a two huh okay, so my speed is to your amazing five man. I don’t know what happened. Oh yes, oh! No!
No! You take that damage. No! It’S a good one! Oh wait!
You’Re right, he’s! Okay, it went all the way through and it hit the wall in the master, bedroom, flash flash’s accuracy and precision with a gun really has me thinking that, maybe you need some sanity and knowledge to have to be able to shoot your target so um. This is my demon teeth and claws biting into your skull: okay, okay, so the demon lord is made. I think i read about that, not fresh on rotten tomatoes. Okay, that’s gon na be two three four, five, six, seven, eight nine!
Oh my gosh! So go! What’S your mite four? Oh! That’S!
So cute! It’S the cute little mic! Okay! So how you use it! It’S it’s not even at all, but but i do have armor.
So it’s four verses! Sorry! What seven i rolled! No! I rolled nine, nine, nine yeah.
So it’s like you, roll the five, so you’re gon na take four points. It would bring me literally to the brink of death. Okay or you can have that nice shiny ring. You love so well really liking you at the brink of death. Okay, all right!
You want to go get on down to the brink, i’m hovering right on the brink there, so the demons are going after michael right now. I assume it’s because will knows that we need the ring for some reason. I’M just i’m. I assume he. I don’t know.
If he knows why, hopefully he doesn’t know why, but i think he knows that we need the ring this demon was. This steve was like wait a minute guys. We were gon na, have a hug party yeah, so this demon is gon na. Do that he needs to lay off the bathtubs. He rolls four, not that great.
So now you can defend with your might and one it is one it shall be. Okay, so that’s three damage my it doesn’t matter. The armor doesn’t save me. I just like to save the record. I went down playing the cello, oh no and that’s father reinhardt, you guys!
May he rest in peace? Should i stack this stuff? How do we want to note this um wait, hang on because that’s gon na happen and because i beat you by more than two, the demons are really interested in just sort of toying with you and holding you on the brink of on the brink of death. Yay, so you stay there with one and you, the demon really wants that shiny, beautiful ring, medallion nope the ring spear nope, the ring, so the demon could just have the ring could have. Let me die with some dignity.
You know, go straight vip pass to heaven. Past the pearly gates, but no he’s gon na. Let me live and just take the ring. So presumably he can drive me insane so good. That’S a lot to look forward to my thought is run stab, run yeah, it’s a good time.
I think that so stab run okay. So now, but here’s the thing this: this costs you one to leave yeah and then it would cost you another two more to get out of there because of the enemies. So i could so you can. You can get into that room, but you can’t leave that room. I’M well worried you guys.
Well, i don’t want to be a defeatist, but i’m dying uh the reinhardt’s, but that’s that’ll, be unfortunate. I don’t want to be a defeatist, but i’m dying um. So i just really want to kill that kid. You want me to kill that kid for you. Yes, i mean why not right, defenseless kid open a portal to hell he kind of come in.
I just think we should go down and kill that kid. A lot like really hard and then we won’t feel so bad when we lose have we killed the demon lord at least once no we’ve killed. Nothing. We’Ve done nothing. I can’t even get to the kid guys you can’t so that’ll cost you two or three.
This will cost you two that’ll cost me two i feel like. I should go in here and stab okay, yeah, okay, okay um. So who are you stabbing at as far as might goes? Doesn’T the blood dagger give you like? Seven, oh yeah, yeah you’re, the most likely person to ever take the demon lord in a fight right and i can – and i can do a second shot, but he still, i think, has nine to your seven he’s got seven he’s got seventy or seven he’s got Seven, might the thing is, though i i can’t i can’t i need the ring, i know, but you can still stun him.
Could i stop him? Save us a round of being attacked. Any monster can be stunned. All right. Maybe i should just do that.
All right. Remember that time, you rolled all blanks. Remember that time i rolled all tooths. I remember that. That’S a great role, all right, four, five, six!
Okay! Please don’t be in vain. Please don’t be in pain. That’S a loss! Two!
Four! Six! Eight! That’S ten! He only does four points to you.
Oh no! Well i could do dead or i could do dead. Oh please take dead. You know i’m just gon na. I don’t know that sounds good yeah.
That sounds good. Okay, we hardly knew you. We got no gypsy. Now. I know i said a lot of bad things, but three people on the board is better than two people on the board um.
However, she did drop some stuff, so i think i’m gon na go, try and steal her stuff. That’S what you do when your friend dies right, i mean they both are really buffed, so i feel like, as far as their items go and their buffs go. They they could still make this happen. We’Re done! That’S it.
We’Re done well, father reinhardt could turn tail and run, but he’s just going to stick it out and go mono uh. It’S going to drop he’s going to try to go against the demons: okay, great um and uh. Now you cannot attack with sanity, no because from hell’s heart i stab you with one dice really oh three dice, because i get my scare yeah there you go all right. My mite is one okay and you’re attacking who now got ta. Go with the lord right.
Okay, great the demon lord got ta go after the big guy. All right. Four, all right good on a three row might is um seven. So what happened? I’M okay!
Well, it’s like they say in leviticus uh. I am dead now because of demons. So good luck! Okay, so he falls down good luck. Running away, so michael died, we’re screwed, stop watching the show close the tab, another one for will.
Wheaton he’s he’s got us. I just don’t see a way we’re done. I will point out that all of this could have been avoided if they had just come to the game room and given hugs all right. So what are you gon na do flash? Okay?
This will go down guns blazing yeah. Well, the thing is: if you don’t get the ring, nothing can ever be accomplished yeah and you could run all you should totally come. Try to take the ring from us. We would really like that. I think you got it man.
We think that would be terrific. Okay, i have faith in you, hey flash hogs, all right, let’s go come, get hugs, flash! Okay! Let’S do it! Okay!
One two: are you gon na shoot this guy? Are you gon na come here and try to shoot these guys? I’M gon na? Do i’m gon na come here one two and then three to leave three and that’s four? Okay, then that’s all i have that’s all you got all right, um, so yeah he has the ring.
Yep he’s got the rings gon na shoot at him. Okay, if you did that he would drop the ring in that room and then you’d have to come pick it up. Well, what do you think about bullets? Okay, all right! Let’S go all right, you’re gon na shoot at him.
Honestly, our chances may not be good, but there’s always always a possibility of still coming out on top. So you never know. There’S five dice and that’s demon number one who has my five: okay, six? Okay, so your old is six and he rolls six and then so he’s like seriously all right that one spot on the master bedroom wall is just awful. Okay, flash is so bad shooting that gun, i’m actually kind of surprised.
He hasn’t shot himself, it’s as if he has been blindfolded and also is a paraplegic. No, i take that back. Actually, if you tried to shoot himself, he would very likely miss okay. Now, um the demons are gon na do demon stuff. So the first things can happen is this demon is gon na move, so he rolls five dice.
Okay, he’s like oh, hey, how’s it going okay, hog time. Oh, oh only! Three! That’S not very good! Ah, what happened?
What just i blame? The gypsy happened. No, we already established right. Okay, i’m sorry, no yeah! No, it’s you!
You you’re the weak link here. The hell gate is open. You scrub the blood from your eyes with the heel of your palm. The sickly sweet tang in the air is just like that in your dream, the tangled bodies of your fellow explorers form a throne of flesh for the demon. Lord, the screaming has only just begun, just as you have always dreamed.
Okay, if i’m going to be a flesh throne, i call back part wow bow. We bounced the demon. Lord sorry guys, there’s just no room for me on the loser’s couch today uh. I genuinely hope that you had a good time and sincerely thanks to every one of you for coming to be on my show thanks. I’M really glad that you did that.
Thank you and i hope that you had a good time being killed, even though he got spanked there. It is i’m gon na go back again. Yeah, i’m gon na go downstairs now and i’m going to present myself with an award because i’m the winner that it works, just wait. It works. We just wait just stay here.
We just sit here right now. We uh we charged it pretty bad. You guys don’t have a ride out here will wheaton. It is a delight to see you here in front of the winner’s wall again, especially because it looks like you fell down and some of your shoulder got rubbed off. So it is my great pleasure to present to you the tabletop certificate of awesome to will wheaton and his demons and uh i’m gon na put a seal on it, so that you know it’s all official look at that little demons and everything would you like to Make a victory speech will wheaton?
Oh, what can i say that hasn’t been said before the only thing better than winning is winning again. I know, and i hope that you do win again so do i and if i could just add one thing: what’s that i’m a really big fan of your show, tabletop oh, go on you’re, embarrassing me! Well, listen! Thank you for coming and playing on the show and uh. I hope we’ll see you again next time.
I know me too: hey everybody thanks a lot for watching tabletop, we’ll see you next time and until then play more games. Hey. What about me? How am i gon na get walked away, guys guys yeah, you look like you probably need some touch-ups anyway, i’m gon na take you to the crop department, bye,